Until the Ice Begins to Break
by HichiShirosaki
Summary: I never thought my dad would die on me. Having moved to a new place, no friends and no family to talk to besides my aunt who is a phone call away...no one, until I meet a certain military teen. Why is he so fimilar? Do I know him? What's going on! OOC..?
1. Terrible beginnings

**Hey there! Here I am, writing a story for Full Metal Panic. I have never written a story in first-person so please bear with me if there are too many I's. **

_Hello_**-thinking**

_**Hello**_**-conscience**

**Enjoy! **

**~HichiShirosaki**

* * *

Who am I? That's an easy one. My names is Tsurara Shizuki and I... I... Okay, there really is nothing much that I can say about myself. I don't even know where to start anyways. I guess to begin with, I was born in a secret base where my mother died giving birth to me, quite the dramatic way to talk about myself but hey, how else am I supposed to start? My father was a military businessman I guess, I never knew what it was that he did for a living but because of his area of expertise, him and my mother had to live in that base since before I was born. Anyway, in that secret military, I learned to fight when I was at a very young age. My father didn't want me to learn to fight in fear I would get myself killed from the intense training but he allowed me to take the risk because I had never really been out and able to do my own thing. So, now I was able to have my own expression I guess you could say. I learned many different ways to fight; from sword fighting, to shooting with guns, to using knives to strike people from a distance(not that I would do that anyway), to fist fights and many others that I am too lazy to list right now. Then we had to go, I didn't know why but we had to move a few times until we stopped at Okinawa. That was four years and here I am... I'm seventeen years old and in a city I don't even remember!

Did I have friends on the base? I can't really answer that question. I mean, there were people I talked to and had a good time with but I'm not sure I would have called them my friends. Funny enough, after having been with them for so long, I've already forgotten their names. *chuckles sadly* Maybe if I see them someday I'll recognize them.

Does that sum it all up? Oh! One more thing. Recently, my father passed away due to a heart condition he's had since before I was born. That's what I was told at least. Having no father, my aunt sent me here, to this town... *grumble grumble grumble* She bought me an apartment and furniture and everything, talk about having money...

My eyes slowly opened to an alarm going off on the nightstand next to my bed. My hand moved towards the constant beeping and I kept on touching the alarm until I hit the button that turned the annoying sound off. I sat up and looked around the room sleepily, my droopy eyes wanting to close and let me fall on my pillow so I can sleep even longer than I should. and that's what I did.

My eyes opened once again and they drifted over to the alarm clock.

"Mmm, 8:00." I murmured. I stretched in my sheets and yawned. "Wait... Didn't I have..." My eyes opened in realization and I shot out my bed. "Shit!" There was no time to take a shower so I just threw my uniform on, brushed my hair and my teeth. Then ran out the door with my bag in hand. My feet fell lightly on the ground and I ran as fast as possible.

_I can't be late, not on my first day._

"Awwh damn it!" I managed to yell through my pounding heart and my urge to breath shallowly. My legs moved in quick and long strides, my hair blew in the wind and you could say I looked like a sliver streak because of the speed in which my legs were going. Buildings and people passed as the school came into my view. The gate was still open to my relief and my legs stopped once I entered the gate. In front of the school was a rather young woman. Flawless light skin, brown hair and eyes, pink lips, and professional clothing. She looked like she was going to an executive meeting...or whatever those were called.

"Tsurara Shizuki?" She called. I nodded and approached her. Finally knowing what I looked like, she shook her head disappointingly. "Your first day at this school and you're already late, I really do hope you don't turn out like one of my students."

"Who?" I asked. She shook her.

"I'm sure you'll meet him soon." The woman assured. "Anyway, welcome to Jindai High, please follow me." She started walking into the entrance of the school and I followed her in without argument. A gruff sound quietly came out of my mouth as my eyes were scanning the halls and taking in every tiny detail that presented itself.

_Typical high school, it all looks like the school I went to in Okinawa... Still not a bad school though. _We continued walking and I paid no attention to the classroom she led me in up until I heard her call my name. Now that I looked around the classroom, students stared at me and they seemed to be absorbing my appearance. My name was repeated and I blinked in confusion, having turned my head to the now annoyed teacher.

"Hm?" Some of the students snickered at me then others whispered, talking about the silver hair that trailed down to my knees and the searing ocean blue eyes that showed knowledge beyond my years. The teacher sighed, her hand covering her face in irritation.

"Please introduce yourself." She sighed. I blinked in confusion and my head tilted slightly down to the left.

"Why?" I asked. The feeling of the students gaping at me was quite overpowering but that was easily ignored but it was hard to ignore the teacher's. "Didn't you already say my name anyway?" She sighed.

"Yes but it would be preferred if you give a background of yourself."

"But you haven't told me your name." I countered. The teacher smirked at me with amusement.

"Very true." She agreed. "Okay, I'm Miss Kagurazaka." I smiled.

"Much better." I turned towards the class and bowed, my hair falling to the ground in front of my face. "My name is Tsurara Shizuki, I recently moved here from Okinawa due to an unfortunate situation and here I am." My upper body regaining it's original posture and I smiled, trying to hide my annoyance with the continually quiet class. All of a sudden, a hand grabbed my bag and pulled it off of my shoulder. My head turned and Ms. Kagurazaka was going through my bag. She pulled something out of the bag that I had completely forgotten to leave home, my knife... I sweat dropped as the class including Ms. Kagurazaka gaped in shock at what she had in her hand.

"Please tell me this is a toy..." She said incredulously. My right hand covered my face and I shook my head.

"I'm afraid not..." I exhaled. "I don't carry toys around." Anger slowly showed on her face. She silently placed the knife back in the bag and closed it.

"She's mad now..." A student muttered. I sighed and grabbed the bag she had in her hand. My body moved towards the exit of the classroom.

"Damn it... I'll just go to the principal's now then." The voice that was mine said. "See you later."

"Who the hell brings a knife to school...?" I heard a student ask silently. "That sounds like something Sousuke would do..." _Sousuke? Is that the boy Kagurazaka was talking about? Sound familiar... _My shoulders shrugged and I continued to walk out of classroom and into the hallway, having no idea where to go...

xXx

"Why would you bring a knife to school?" The principal questioned. "And on your first day of school?" I sighed and scratched my head nervously.

"I already told you." I said, "I forgot my knife was there, it's not like I did it on purpose." The knife was on her desk and she picked it up to examine it. Then she set it back down and sighed.

"I guess it's alright as long as you don't bring it again..." The principal sighed. My head moved up and down in agreement, hoping that I wouldn't get punished like I did at my first day at the school in Okinawa. "Deal?"

"Deal." I repeated.

"I'm only letting you off once. You can go." She said, "take your knife too." The knife was grabbed and I placed it in my bag. Then my feet moved with speed and I was out the door before you knew it. _Get me out of here..._The legs I was born with moved with speed and I was out the door of the school before too long. My legs stopped and I began walking with a somewhat quick pace. Students looked my way and my ears could hear the whispers and snickers going my way.

"Was she the one that brought the knife...?"

"No way, she looks completely harmless!"

"Great, now it's a girl version of that Sousuke freak!"

"It's people like her that give this school a bad reputation."

_Reputation? Ridiculous. Who cares about that? Oh whatever. Think what you like. _

_**Why not give them a nice talking to Boss? I'm sure they'll understand once they get to know you. **_

_Oh shut up. _I sighed and looked up at the sky. The sky was a baby blue and light, creamy white clouds seemed to just float in the atmosphere. It was really peaceful for a day full of shit. Another sigh escaped my lips.

"Something the matter?" Someone asked. My head turned towards the voice and I saw a girl with long, blue hair and brown eyes. Then there was a boy next to her with a scar on his cheek in the shape of an X.

_I've seen that scar somewhere before... _I blinked at the girl and smiled, shaking my head in the process.

"Oh, it's nothing." I assured, "and it if was something, it's nothing I can't deal with on my own." She stared at me wide eyed for a moment then stuck her hand in front of me.

"I'm Kaname Chidori." She introduced. _Talk about blunt... _I took her hand and shook it.

"Tsurara."

"I know. We have first period together." My face faltered with a feeling of dread and regret at what happened with the knife found in my bag.

"Hey, don't even worry about what happened." She assured. Widened eyes occupied my face at the moment. "Sousuke is always bringing guns to school and he hasn't gotten expelled yet." I looked at the boy with the scar.

"So you're Sousuke huh?" I asked. He nodded.

"Pleasure to meet you Shizuki." He greeted with no emotion whatsoever. I gave him a blank stare.

"Gee thanks..." Sarcasm and bitterness escaped with those words without even realizing it. Kaname looked at Sousuke to see what he would do but when he didn't say anything she sighed and looked at me with confusion in her eyes.

"I wonder of I can ask..." She trailed, "can I ask why you brought a knife to school."

"Safety." Was my automatic response. She blinked and I shrugged in response.

"You bring a weapon to feel safe?" She asked unbelieving.

"Yeah." I said slowly, "don't you...?" She shook her head.

"Of course not!" She exclaimed, "unless I want to turn up like Sargent over here then no."

Hm..."

"Can I ask why?"

"You wouldn't understand even if I told you." I retorted and walked away as but as my feet moved away from them though, my ears caught a small conversation that left me with a feeling that maybe the Sousuke kid knew me long before I even came to this school...

"That girl..." Sousuke trailed.

"What about her?" He looked deep in thought and shook his head.

"Never-mind, it's nothing."

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**Read and Review please! They are my cookies after all. X3**


	2. Apologies

**Okay, so I have decided to try to update every two weeks and I'm going to try to stay ahead a chapter. So, since I posted this chapter I'll be working on chapter four and so on. I'm sorry if I end up not updating in a while, two weeks should be a long enough time span to fit in this story and school though. **

**Disclaimer! Because I don't want to get sued. The only thing that belongs to me is my lovely OC. **

**Anyway, please read and I hope you like it. I'm sorry if it seems rushed... I'll try to slow it down the best I can, the thing is that I've never been all that great at keeping a slow pace... **

**If there is anything that you do not understand, please by all means, let me know. **

**Special thanks to: My Broken Voice **

**Enjoy. ^_^ **

**~HichiShirosaki **

School was no different than the day before, other than the fact that I didn't get caught with a gun because it was by my decision to bring my hand gun to school. It was hidden underneath my skirt strapped on my upper thigh. No one would be able to see it unless they decided to look down my skirt, as bad as that sounds.

People looked my way with watchful eyes like a hawk watched a mouse. The mouse being the meat of course and me being the mouse. It was like this when I first went to my school at Okinawa, the students watched me like the others are now. It was quite annoying but there was nothing to be done to stop it. They have the ability to think what they want. Not that I care.

Maybe they thought I was another "Sousuke," no clue. Why does that name sound so familiar anyway. My mind tried hard to remember but nothing could go through the squishy nothing that was my brain. The detailed memories that were engraved in my brain for the rest of my life couldn't help me remember why it was that Sousuke's name stuck out to me. Maybe it's from my time at the base before the move?

My breath escaped my lips in a sigh and my fists clenched in determination. I'm not going to let what other kids are thinking get to me. I was trained at a secret military base after all, so I should be okay right? I sure do hope so... While I was standing there lost in my thoughts, a hand touched my shoulders very elegantly and lightly. The feeling of fright caught me off guard and I grabbed the hand and in turn flipping the body over me. Screaming occurred for only a few seconds then there was a thud on the ground. Turned out I had gone ahead flipped Kaname right over me without even thinking... My eyes widened as students stopped to see the mistake I just made.

"Miss Chidori!" Sousuke called. When he saw her, his eyes widened and he began to sweat-drop. He started watching me and watching Kaname as she groaned. Is he afraid of her? Kaname's eyes drifted over my own and an unexplainable anger seemed to arise. Shock began to course through me as she got up and dusted off her skirt. Then her fist went right towards my face and my hand stopped it just like that.

"How dare you!" She yelled. Her foot came up and I jumped back, having flipped and landing on my feet. "I try to be your friend and what do you do!" Kaname ran towards me and tried to give me a side kick. My right foot came up and blocked it then my foot crashed with her chest and she flew back a few feet. "You flip me over!"

"I didn't mean to..." I said through my breath. "If you would give me a chance to explain instead of fighting over a simple mistake this wouldn't happen!" My cheek felt the searing pain of her fist as it crashed into my face and sent me flying. I hit the ground with a thud and got up despite the pain in my legs. I soothed my swollen cheek while spit hit the ground. I eyed Kaname as she had this air of triumph. Sousuke watched the whole thing, obviously not knowing what to do.

"Teaches you..." Kaname grumbled. My eyes sent daggers at her. My fist clenched and I ran towards Kaname, turning her around and grabbing her shoulder.

"I don't understand!" I yelled, "yesterday you were so nice to me even if that was one time. Then when I made one mistake you get so fucking angry that you have to try to kick my ass to feel better! I just don't get it! Next time how about you get your facts straight!" I let go of her and looked around. Students stared at Kaname and me all bug eyed so I began to fluster. Teeth gritting against one another, and clothes all dirty and gross. "Fuck this, I'm going home." She stared at me as I bolted out the gate, not giving anyone even a second glance. _What a temper I have... _

~xXx~

Knocks on the door sounded and my dreamy eyes opened slowly. I looked around the room with bewilderment. Did I fall asleep on the couch? I felt something strange going down a side of my mouth to find that drool had trailed down my mouth so I wiped it away with the sleeve of my sweater and following soon afterward, I smacked my lips tiredly.

"Just a moment!" I called. The room was dark and it was difficult to walk through the darkness. I got off the couch and stumbled to the front of the apartment, wherever that was. My hand trailed against the wall up until the feeling of the light switch was available. The switch turned the lights on and the light was cringing. I turned the door knob and opened the door to be greeted by Sousuke. I blinked. "Sousuke? What are you doing here? How did you know where I live?" He struck s military pose with his hands behind his back and bowed. I gave him a 'what the hell are you doing' look and let out a breath of confusion. I didn't really mind though, it reminded me of my father.

"I'm sorry to bother you Miss Shizuki, but I came here to apologize."

"What for?" I asked. "Don't tell me you're apologizing for Kaname..." He nodded and I sighed. "Will you come in?" I walked away from him going deeper into my apartment. He followed after me once he closed the door, and I led him into the kitchen. "You can sit of you like."

"Were you asleep?" He asked. I shrugged in response.

"Yeah but oh well. I shouldn't sleep the world away, it isn't going to help me any time soon anyway..." I grumbled. I went into the fridge and pulled out a pitcher of tea and two glasses from the cabinet next to it. I set one in front of Sousuke and held my own. The cool amber liquid filled the cup, then it filled my own. I took a seat across from him and took a sip while he just looked at his glass. Both hands held onto my glass and I looked at him with a silent wonder.

"Why do you want to apologize for her?" I questioned. He blinked as though he realized he was here and slowly lifted his gaze into my own. "Unless, you're not here to apologize...?" He didn't say anything. I scratched my head in confusion and yawned.

_**He's acting really strange boss...**_

_I know that. I haven't known him for long and I can already tell he's really out of it._

_**...I'm not sure it's that you haven't known him long enough.**_

_What?_

"Like I said, I'm here to apologize." A voice seemed to say which snapped me out of my thoughts.

"I seriously doubt it." Was my automatic response.

"What?"

"Nothing." My fingers made slow, consistent taps on the wood table and all Sousuke did was watch. Perhaps he was deep into his own thoughts? "I would think you're here to beat the shit out of me..."

"No M'am, of course not." He assured instantly. "I don't fight anywhere but in the battlefield." I became utterly amused.

"Really now?" I asked sarcastically, "and I suppose you fight all the time, in harsh and cruel battles with those Mecha battle suits I have heard so much about" I eyed him with amusement, and I smiled jokingly. No answer, and and after a few moments the air became thick with an unbelieving air then I caught onto his answer even if he wasn't going to say it. "You've got to be kidding me..."

"Believe what you must Miss Shizuki" He replied, eyes all serious like.

"There's no way." I laughed, "you, a teenager in high school? Ridiculous." I was taught to approach things like this with extreme caution or keep off of it. How am I to know if he's lying of not? My dad was even more cautious. He always made sure I went where I was supposed to go and someone had to be with me most of the time. I had to have one of his military bodyguards with me besides when I was in school.

I stopped laughing to find him blushing a little bit...? I started to laugh a little more and wiped the tears that had formed in my eyes. His own eyes widened and he became concerned.

"You're crying?" He asked, "why? You're not hurt are you?"

"Obviously not." I answered with a chuckle, "people can cry when they laugh too much. You've never done that before?" He shook his head.

"No M'am."

"You're missing out then." I said with a smile. _Why is it I can talk to him so easily? I've only just met him..._

_**I doubt that Boss. You just need to remember.**_

_What do you mean? _

_**I think you two know each other and he might have remembered. That could be why he's here, ya know Boss?**_

_Um...no._

_I feel like I'm going insane...why the hell am I talking to my conscience anyway? Is that even possible?_

_**It's up to you boss... If I'm only your conscience then you're technically thinking to yourself.**_

_Ugh._

"So, just to be clear...you're only here to apologize?" I asked to be sure.

"Affirmative." I stood out of my seat with my hands now resting on the table.

"I feel like there's more to it though Sousuke." I pried. "Why else would you be here? There's no way you would go to all the trouble of finding my address just to apologize."

"I do what's necessary." He explained. "It seemed like the logical thing to do." My body leaned over the table.

"I wouldn't call that necessary." I replied. "Nor would I call that logical, I feel like you're just using that apology thing as an excuse..." He shook his head nervously.

"N-no Miss Shizuki." He tried to deny, "I'm simply just-" He was interrupted by the song of a guitar streaming. He blinked as did I and I dug into my pocket to find my phone.

"Was this in my pocket the whole time...?" I asked myself. The phone flipped open to the greeting of my aunt trying to call. My thumb pressed on the green call button and the phone went towards my ear. "Kiki?"

"Hey! Tsurara, I was wondering how you're doing on your own right now?"

"Um..." I began, "I'm doing fine. What's going on?"

"What makes you think there's something going?" She asked.

"You never call unless you have to." Silence for a few moments. "Well?" I heard a sigh on the other end.

"It's about the funeral..."

"Oh." Was the only thing I had to say, at the moment at least. "Well, I can't talk about that right now. I have a guest over."

"Oh really?" Her aunt said smoothly. "Who is it?"

"None of your business." Her aunt sighed again.

"Alright well, call me back when he leaves." She ordered, "deal?"

"Deal." I repeated. "Talk to you later..." The phone on the other end went dead and I closed the phone, not knowing what to say next or what to do. I looked to Sousuke for something to do but once again, like the idiot he was, he sat there. "You-you should probably go..." He nodded and got out of his chair. My legs were moving and I was leading him to the entrance of the apartment before I knew it. He bowed in his special military fashion.

"Thank you for having me over." He said. _Did I have a choice? _

_**Yes you did, Boss. **_

_Shut up. _Saying shut up to my own conscience...ridiculous.

"And I'm sorry." That snapped me out of my annoying, interrupting thoughts.

"What? Why?" I didn't get to hear that answer because he left. Just like that, he left. Without a good-bye or a farewell. "Hm...how rude." As the door shut behind me, my eyes were able to catch a small piece of paper laid out on the floor in front of me. I picked it up and unfolded the paper to find the word "You don't remember me" written on the paper. I made a gruff sound and tossed the paper in the trash, having no idea at the hint that was obviously laid out for me to see and me only. Only I knew the true meaning behind the sentence but I was too dense and caught up in my own shit to see through it. The only thing on my mind was calling my aunt back to see what was to be done about my dad's funeral...

**As blunt and plain as that might be...I want to know what you think. So please, review? They're my cookies and I can't live without my cookies. ;) **


	3. Burdens and Friends

**Hey! HichiShirosaki here with another chapter for you guys. **

**Thank you _My Broken Voice_ for reviewing and telling me how much you like my story. So far, you're my biggest encouragement and I really appreciate that. :3 **

**Enjoy! **

The breeze blew silently, gently blowing against my silver locks and causing them to sway in the wind. Everything hushed except for the birds, quietly chirping meanwhile soaring in the brilliant blue sky. The clouds were set just right to where they only looked like creamy wisps of color staining the relatively peaceful blue.

Lying there, skipping class to take a peak at the art laid out for all to see, was the best thing to do when there was too much on a person's mind, and that person would have to be me. My eyes were closed when a soft smile crept on my face. Somehow, it had gotten past the emotional turmoil trying so hard to be released. From everything that had happened, I never understood how I was able to hid things so easily and act as though everything was okay when it was obviously not.

I remain as calm as possible, normal people not able to see the pain my heart tries so hard to bear alone. That small, fragile heart that can break at any moment and go on an emotional rampage. Even the smallest crack could cause it to shatter and fall into many nonrecoverable pieces.

The only way I was able to relieve the emotional baggage was to fight but I don't want trouble here, not yet at least. So the only thing that was an option was to just stare at the sky, be mystified by nature's gifts and hopefully everything will pass as a phase or something. That was the hope anyway, who knows what's going to happen?

I took a deep breath and let that breath loose in a sigh. My head rested on my arms that were crossed one another underneath.

_~earlier~ _

"_The funeral is going to be a few weeks from now." My aunt said on the other end. "I'll let you know of the exact date when we get closer to it." _

"_Okay." _

"_By which I expect you to be here Tsurara." She demanded, "I'm not going to have the daughter of my brave brother skip his funeral because she doesn't "feel like it" or because she is "too emotional." You've dealt with worse things, so you and I both know you can deal with it. You'll have to prepare a speech anyhow. Remember." _

"_Do I really have to do the speech?" I asked. No way was I going to go in front of many of my dad's colleagues and talk about him. I may like to fight but there's no way I could fight stage fright, and why wouldn't I go to my dad's own funeral anyway. I mean come on. It's my dad, I respected him more than anybody. He was a role model to me and everyone around him in which he affected in some way. It was amazing really. Although I never truely tried getting close enough, I could see how much he's impacted a person just by watching him. _

"_Yes you will." Kiki answered, "I'll force you to, got it?" _

"_Yes Kiki." __I said obediently into the phone. _

"_Aunt Kiki." She corrected me. "Anyway, before I go..." _

"_Hm?" _

"_Takeshi called earlier today, he wanted to know how you were doing." She explained. A gruff sound came out of the depths of my throat in amusement. _

"_Since when does he care how I'm doing?" Was my reply. _

"_Oh hush up, you know he cares about you." _

"_I've only been here for what? Three days?" I asked. "He's probably asking to mess with me..."_

"_That's a lie and you know it." Aunt Kiki stated. " So I've gone to the liberty of giving him your number and your email." I groaned. _

"_Thanks." I said, a hint of sarcasm following that word. _

"_Anyway..." Kiki continued, obviously ignoring my "thanks." "I need to get going now, I have some more planning for the funeral." A sigh was heard on the other end. "Just don't get depressed while you're on your own."_

"_I won't." A lie of course, not that my weird aunt would notice. _

"_Okay. Bye Tsurara. Love you." Click, dead tone. I stood there, my eyes seemingly staring at the phone now in my eerily calm hands. There was no thought going through my head, no emotion. I was dead, just dead. There was no feeling, it was numb. Everything seemed frozen, as though my body had been encased in ice for a century. How often was this going to happen? My mind going on a complete blank and not knowing what to feel or think. _

"_I wonder how long I'll be able to take the heat..." I muttered to myself. _

_~xXx~_

The smile left as quickly as it had come. I took a deep breath of the fresh air and exhaled.

"Just relax Tsurara." I told myself, "you can do it. Stay strong." My eyes opened to stare at the sky again, to realize that the winds had stopped. The winds that stroked my face like a hand caressing my cheek. That seemed to carry my trouble away, if only for the moment. It was gone and I was left wanting the wind even more. The peaceful, cool breeze that had made my clothes sway back and forth and gave me the comfort of nature was now gone.

A sound could be heard and it interrupted my thoughts. I dug into my skirt pocket and pulled out my phone. I flipped it open to find that the number from the message was unknown. My eyes narrowed, if only for the moment.

_You still trying to do everything on your own? Seriously, when will you learn Rara. Your Aunt is worried shitless and she actually wants me to go visit you and watch over you for a couple weeks. Who does she think I am? Your bodyguard? ;) And it's only been what? Three days? You better message back something meaningful. I don't want to hear all your "I'm fine" shit. You know I fucking hate it when you do that._

My eyes widened for a few seconds until I realized who it was that had messages me. No one else calls me Rara but him and he hasn't called me that since a few years ago. Not only that but who else would send me a random topic but him? My eyes softened ever so slightly and a smile managed to show on my face. _What an idiot._

_**I guess Aunt Kiki was right huh, boss?**_

_Huh? Oh yeah, sure._

A sigh managed to get past my lips and I closed the phone. I really didn't want to respond, what was I going to say anyway? It's not like I'm going to pour everything to him now am I? No, not my style.

I got up and stretched, my hands almost touching the floor. A yawn escaped and I smacked my lips tiredly.

The breeze let up again and the bird's chirping seemed to resume in my ear as though they had stopped when the wind had died down. My ocean blue eyes quickly skimmed the areas around me before I walked to the stairs the led to the classrooms below.

~xXx~

The bell rang, signaling the end of school. The chattering of the students was heard through the thoughts that were consuming my mind and it was bugging the shit out of me. My thoughts soon blocked all of the chatter and I heard no more.

_How the hell am I supposed to prepare a speech in two weeks? She knows I can't deal with stage fright...especially at my dad's funeral._

_**There's always time to learn to stand up against your frights. Aunt Kiki knows that when it comes to yourself. It's almost like you're afraid to "fight" yourself... Do you think she's trying to teach you something, Boss?**_

_Doubt it... _I let out a groan.

"Damn it Kiki..." I muttered to myself. Then a picture of my dad flashed through my head. I stopped walking and stood there for what seemed like an eternity. "Why did you have to go and leave me...?"

Pain I had never felt before all of a sudden rushed through me. It was as though someone had stabbed me in the heart, or rather like my heart is tightening. Like it's trying to hold itself together, so it won't break like the fragile thing it is.

Something, or rather _someone _pulled me away from the emotions that were acting like an anchor. An anchor for the emotions I was trying not to show and the person who snapped me out of my daze was Kaname of course.

The eyes that seemed to have dimmed, blinked and looked around, scanning the people silently watching me while Kaname was trying to grab my attention.

"Where the hell were you?" She demanded. Her finger appeared only a few inches from my face. My eyes tore away from the area around me and I looked up at her in slight confusion.

"What...?" She sighed.

"What were you doing for the first half of school?" She asked. This time I could tell that she was trying to be as kind as she could to me, not that I really care.

"Why do you want to know?" I retorted. That kind personality she displayed disappeared as quickly as it had come and frustration appeared on her face. She growled. "Calm down, calm down. I was sitting on the roof of the school, don't even worry." She blinked surprisingly at the fast response, frustration still on her face.

"...and you were there why...?" I shrugged. I would never tell her why I was there, nor would I tell her anything at all for that matter.

"The view." Kaname looked at me with skepticism. _Boy do her faces change quickly... _"I'm being honest, why do you even care anyway...?" She started to blush slightly.

"No-no reason." I started walking away.

"Suit yourself."

"I think she was worried about you Miss Shizuki." I stopped and turned around, Sousuke was by Kaname's side.

"I was wondering where you'd be Sousuke." I sneered.

"I just had to take care of some business." He answered. I returned to them and placed my hands on my hips. I smiled at Kaname and at Sousuke. Then I looked at Sousuke with my don't-you-forget-last night eyes. He gulped and I looked back at Kaname.

"So...you were worried about me?"

"Of course I was!" She burst out for all to hear. "If you are anything like this idiot here-" She elbowed him. "I have every reason to worry!"

"Even despite what you did to me yesterday?" I pried. She blinked and her face strained for the moment.

"Yes, even after yesterday." She admitted, "I'm sorry I hit you." I smiled in victory.

"I guess you aren't a bad person after all." I gleamed, "right Sousuke?" He thought about it for a moment until Kaname looked at him evilly.

"Yes!" He answered right after. I chuckled a little and walked away.

"Wh-where are you going?" Kaname called.

"I don't know about you, but I'm tired." I lied, "so I'm going home to get some shut-eye. See ya." As I was walking, my eyes dimmed again and I was once more thinking about the funeral that was coming up in a few weeks. I had no idea what to do. What was it that I was supposed to say in my speech anyway?

_What would Kiki do if I went to the funeral and I didn't have a speech prepared? _

_**Why are you even asking that, Boss? You know what she would do. **_

_Yeah, yell the shit out of me. _

_**Um...on second thought, I don't think she would do anything seeing as it's your father's funeral... Obviously. **_

_...hm. _

_**Maybe you should talk to ****Takeshi, Boss. I'm sure he would understand and want to help you. It seems like you need someone to talk to. **_

_As tempting as that is, I think not. _

_**Why not, Boss? **_

_I don't want to burden him, he lives far away anyhow. I don't want to take advantage of our friendship. _

_**Lair. **_I stopped in front of my apartment complex and stood there contemplating whether or not that was really the case. Am I just thinking like that because I don't want anyone to think I'm weak? I didn't know, I was so confused. Friends are people I can go to in a time of need right? I didn't have much experience in that area but I did know one thing. I made two friends today and I wondered if they were friends I would have no matter what happened and no matter what went my way...

**For those who are wondering who Takeshi is, I'm not planning on giving detail on him until later in the story when he is truly introduced. There will be brief talks about him in the next few chapters for sure. I'm also planning on Sousuke and Kaname being in the story more. Please review!**

**I'm so behind in my chapters! Please Please Please, someone help me! D: **


	4. Desire and Demand

**I'm so sorry! D: I'm sorry I didn't update fast enough! I was just really lazy and I had writers block. **

**I have to be honest, now that I read what I wrote in the previous chapters and I compare it to the fanfic I finished a few months back, I think I'm doing a better job in this piece of work. Just saying, I don't care if you might agree with me or not.**

**One more disclaimer! OC's and storyline ideas belong to me. The anime however, does not (no matter how much I might wish it)**

**Also, I'm adding different point of views into the story to make things slow down and add a little more insight as to why certain events happen. So this will only be a sample so you can tell me what you think of the changing views, I personally think it will add more detail about what's going on and what will go on in future chapters. **

**Now that's over with, please continue on and read this lovely chapter! **

**~HichiShirosaki**

**_~Two days later~_**

_Why the hell won't you respond to my messages Rara? If you're doing this then there must be something wrong. Please, don't leave me out of the loop. _

I sighed and I closed my phone, sticking it in my skirt pocket. _I swear he really needs to leave me alone, I obviously don't want to talk to him... _

"Miss Shizuki?" Someone called. I returned to the real world and looked up at Sousuke.

"Yeah?"

"Are you alright?" He asked with worry, "you don't seem like yourself today." I blinked and tried to smile.

"No no." I assured, "I'm okay."

"Are you sure Miss Shizuki?" He questioned. I nodded, showing a smile once again. Sousuke believed my smile and went over to Kaname. I watched as they interacted more and more like best friends. My eyes closed slightly. I began to wish that I was back home with my Aunt. It made me feel quite lonely, and quite envious might I add. I didn't have friends that much before I had moved here. Because my dad was gone all the time, he never really taught me the value of social skills. Nor did he teach me how to use them. Then considering the fact that I was in the base for most of my life so far with no one to talk to, I didn't bother make any friends when I got put in a new place. It was one of those things that didn't seem to matter to me. I had one friend that meant the world to me but now that I was on my own again, I wanted what Kaname and Sousuke had. It was as simple as that, and it made my heart wrench in desire for that.

~xXx~

"Sir what do you want to do about the girl?" A man asked. His hair was a dirty-blonde, strewn in a mess, more like a nest. His face covered in sweat due to the nervousness consuming him. He didn't want the girl to die but it wasn't his choice to make, it was up to the commander. The man didn't even know why the girl was so important anyway. Not only that but they didn't even have a clue as to where she was. After her father died, she moved **(hint hint).** A good move on her part is what the man thought.

"We have to find her." Another man of seemingly great importance, stood in front of many monitors each containing a map of the islands of Japan. Cities were marked with red and blue. "We can't let someone like her go to waste..."

**I understand this is very very very short. I just didn't know any other way to continue with this chapter and this is the first time I wasn't too lazy to go over this chapter. _ So I'm very for not posting this chapter until now. Please forgive me! ...and review too? **


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